Simple but so difficult

 

Simple but so difficult 

 

I haven’t worked on a blog in a while as some may have noticed.  Things in my life as I have mentioned before are falling apart rapidly.  If you see me in person, I could use a hug and prayer more than you could ever know.  I’m not really talking about what’s going on.  I keep coming back to these certain verses in Psalm 42 and 43.  They are simple but so difficult to apply.  Lately I walk through my days praying asking God for some sense of purpose because I feel like I have none.  My life changed drastically in October.  The changes have shaken me to the very core of my being.  I struggle with day-to-day things and the mundane a lot.  At the end of Psalm 42 and 43 they have the exact same verses that say this.

 

“Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad?  I will put my hope in God!  I will praise him again— my Savior and my God!”  

 

There will come times in your life when things just fall apart, and circumstances are just so far from any sense of control.  You have to choose where to turn.  Daily I have to choose to seek God.  I don’t always get it right.  The sad and discouraging part in these verses I can relate to so much lately.  

 

This is something else you and I need to remember.

 

Psalm 46:1-3

 

“God is our refuge and strength, 

Always ready to help in times of trouble.

So we will not fear when earthquakes come and the mountains crumble into the sea.  

Let the oceans roar and foam.  Let the mountains tremble as the waters surge!”

 

There are days I just have to remind myself that God is still in control.  If I don’t I lose my sanity.  I don’t know what battle you may be mentally and emotionally facing but you need to remember that.  This is a blog geared for Hope and I struggle with needing it myself.  

 

 

Hurricane by Natalie Grant 

Whole world in his hands by Christy Nockels 

 

Need

 

Need

 

Sometimes God keeps bringing my attention to certain verses and my heart has needed these verses immensely.  Twice I have opened my Bible and looked at Psalm 33 and at some point I marked with a pen to highlight three verses.

 

Psalm 33:20-22 

 

“We put our hope in the Lord.  He is our help and our shield.  In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name.  Let your unfailing love surround us, Lord, for our hope is in you alone.”  

 

Now I could write a long drawn-out blog to go with this but I’m instead going to pull a play out of the playbook of Pastor Adrian Rogers.  

 

“Point people to scripture and then get out of the way.”  See those verses I just shared we all need.  I can’t apply them for you.  Only you personally can put your Hope in God and whether you want to admit it or not like me you need to do so.  As they say in the pro wrestling business that’s your go home line.  Put your Hope in God!  

 

You alone by Kim Hill

All in all by Charmaine 

Show Up

 

Show up

 

I like to read it’s something my parents instilled in me at a young age.  Bible, comics, novels, graphic novels all kinds of things.  I picked up a book at CVS earlier this year not realizing how much I would need it in the coming months.  But I had a 40% off coupon and had been wanting to read it for a while.  It’s okay not to be okay by Sheila Walsh.  Sometimes it’s a book deemed more for women but men and women both can learn from it.  Recently I found something in it that hit me in a unique way.  For about 11 years I’ve been doing this Bible study blog thing in one form or another.  Starting with meeting people at Denny’s at midnight and changing to something online.  In her book Mrs. Walsh talks about the fear Christians deal with in sharing our faith and how God has still called all of us to do so.  I have mentioned many times my passion and that is for just one person to draw closer to God by something I shared and find hope.  I’m going to share with you something Mrs. Walsh wrote because if you share Christ in some form or another you will come to her realization as well.  

 

Her words not mine.

 

“I have a whole new understanding about what you and I are called to do.  We are called to show up!  It’ll never be about us getting anything perfect, but when we are present God can do what only he can do.”  

 

I’ve talked a bit lately about my new dog Arisia and when my sister and niece took me to the humane society to pick out a dog emotionally, I didn’t want to.  My sister described perfectly what kind of dog I needed to the employee.  “He needs a dog he can roughhouse and wrestle with because he’s a WWE fan.”  My mom keeps saying she is rescuing me, and I am rescuing her.  We play and fight and just have fun.  I truly believe when I walked by her kennel and saw her laying on a cot looking back at me that God had a plan by me showing up and seeing her.  

 

A promise I have held onto all these years of doing this blog thing is found in Isaiah 55:8-11

 

“‘My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,’ says the Lord.  ‘And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.  For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.  The rain and snow come down from the heavens and stay on the ground and water the earth, they cause the grain to grow, producing food for the farmer and bread for the hungry.  It is the same with my Word.  I send it out, and it always produces fruit.  It will accomplish all I want it to, and it will prosper everywhere I send it.”  

 

You see if feeble Zac shows up and shares God’s Word, I can trust that God will use it to change lives because it’s not about me but about God accomplishing what he set out for His Word to do and he’s already promised to do that.  Me showing up that day at the humane society for Arisia was part of the plan God had for her and for me.  But like Mrs. Walsh was saying you have to show up and be willing to be used by God.  I share a blog via email and as a Facebook live video.  It doesn’t make any sense, but I trust God to use it to reach that one person.  

 

Luke 12:11-12 

 

“And when you are brought to trial in the synagogues and before rulers and authorities, don’t worry about how to defend yourself or what to say, for the Holy Spirit will teach you at that time what needs to be said.”  

 

I show up and I am willing to share what God lays on my heart and some days I feel like it just flopped but I trust God to do what only he can do because it’s not about Zac.  I had a life group leader named Kathy a few years back that taught me something.  In the Old Testament, God is referred to as being I Am.  He is not a God who was or is but he is I Am.  He has always existed and always will.  Ms. Kathy said “I am not, but I know I Am.”  Meaning we as humans we’re flawed but we serve the great I Am.  We serve God and we show up willing and trust Him to do what we cannot.  

 

 

God is Faithful by Sheila Walsh

You are I am by Mercy  Me

Tell me again by Geoff Moore and the Distance 

Place of Safety

 

Place of safety 

 

Twice in Psalm 18 in the New Living Translation there is mention of a place of safety.  That’s very much what I’m searching for lately when I pray.  Little by little things are falling apart in my life and I find myself trying to seek God more.  I’m finding comfort in parts of Psalm 18.  I keep coming back to verses 1-2.

 

Psalm 18:1-2

 

“I love you, Lord;

You are my strength.  

The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior.  

My God is my rock in whom I find protection. 

He is my shield, the power that saves me, and the place of my safety.”

 

In verse 19 it once again mentions that place of safety.  If anyone has ever gotten an email from me my signature has that verse in it.  

 

“He led me to a place of safety; he rescued me because he delights in me.”

 

Early Sunday morning I had something happen at work that caused me to pray a lot.  As guards we have to do something called fire watch where we check for smoke or anything burning that may start a building on fire.  I drove the golf cart to this building, and I had been there multiple times that night.  But this time around 3:50 am I went to the back of the building, and I smelled cigarette smoke.  Twice I drove around and couldn’t find the source of it.  When I went for a walkthrough of the building, I turned my music off and gave everything my full attention and started praying.  The air felt completely wrong.  Something just felt evil!  Spider-Man is referred to in the comics as having the ability to sense danger.  I felt that way for moments because something was not right.  I was praying for a place of safety.  God was bigger than whatever was happening in that building.  I knew if a fire broke out, I was not very prepared or trained for it.  We need to seek God in prayer because there is so much in life we can’t handle.  There have been places I have worked over the last few years that when I went to work it felt like I was in the middle of spiritual warfare just being there.  If you find yourself there call on God.  

 

 

Strong tower by Newsboys 

God is bigger by Veggie Tales

Made me glad by Sandi Patty 

Sacred hideaway by 4Him

The Approach

The Approach 

 

As some of you know I have a new dog named Arisia.  We as humans can learn a little about our own behavior when it comes to dogs.  Sometimes she can be very timid when approaching me.  When I noticed this, I thought a bit about how we as humans come to God.  We should definitely approach him with fear and reverence.  For He is holy, and we are sinful creatures, yet he calls us to come to him.  Like my dog we desire to find a place of refuge, comfort, and love.  I mentioned before that I’m dealing with some hurt and pain and my dog reminded me to seek my master because as much as we want to handle things on our own, we can’t do it.  There’s a messed up theology that has been circulating for some years that says “God will never give me more than I can handle “.  Actually, God will use problems to bring you to a choice.  Will you choose to seek him or are you going to do things on your own.  Personally, I’m trying to get better at seeking Him.  I don’t always get it right.  I’m trying hard to read my Bible and listen to Christian music more.  I have the Youversion app on my iPhone and I let it read devotionals and the Bible straight to my hearing aids and I listen to sermons while walking at work.  Small choices can make a difference.

 

Jesus said in Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all ye who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”  

 

God wants us to seek him.  The late Rich Mullins had a song title that just about sums up us as humans.  Simply put “We are not as strong as we think we are.”  All of us like my wobbly dog Arisia are just a few French fries short of a Happy Meal.  

 

Here’s another reason we need to seek God with our problems.  I love how the English Standard Version translates this verse because on days I’m exhausted I’ve prayed this back to God.

 

Psalm 23:3 

“He restores my soul; He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.”  

 

Something as of late that has been bothering me is the sheer plethora of profanity my coworkers use and there are times, I get off work and I’m so happy to be away from it.  God calls us to live a better way.  We need to spend time in prayer and in his Word.  I’ve mentioned before if just one person draws closer to God and finds hope because of something I have shared then I have accomplished my purpose.  Make little choices to seek God.

 

I want to end with these two verses because as someone who works nights, I greatly related to them.

 

 

Psalm 16:7-8

 

“I will bless the Lord who guides me; even at night my heart instructs me.  I know the Lord is always with me.  I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me.”  

 

 

Come near to me by Geoff Moore and the Distance 

God is faithful by Sheila Walsh 

Life to me by ZoeGirl

 

Battle

 

Battle

 

There are things that God has called you to do.  Mine is to encourage.  I have been in some struggles as of late.  Maybe I don’t talk a lot about it. But I’m seeking God.   Saw on Facebook recently my friend Crystal posted this thing that said, “Have you ever given someone else a motivational speech when you yourself are hurting.”  Every week.  If someone can learn from my pain and seek God, then I will keep doing this.  As open and vulnerable as that may be.   I have echoed the words before of Margaret Becker’s song “God’s not afraid of your honesty.  He can heal your heart if you speak honestly.”  I was reminded recently by some friends how much we need to be seeking God in prayer and spending time in the Bible.   Humans are a stupid lot because that sometimes is our last choice.  I’ll admit it.  Sometimes I’m stupid and make bad decisions.   

 

In order to fight my battles, I have to remember how.

 

Psalm 62:5-8

 

“Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him.  

He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.  My victory and honor come from God alone.  He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.  

O my people, trust in Him at all times, Pour out your heart to him, for God is our refuge.”  

 

Another thing I have done during this time is to write poetry.  I have never claimed to be good at it.  But sometimes you must unload your feelings into words.  I’m going to share a poem I called The Fog.  

 

The fog

 

I walk through each day 

I have no focus 

Matter

One day my life may matter

So hard 

To see the next thing, I need to do

Did all I knew to do

Loved with every fiber of my being 

Now I walk around 

Confused 

Must keep breathing 

I don’t know why

Scattered 

Shattered 

World has crumbled 

Need hugs

Prayer

Something to focus on 

Can’t give in to anger or bitterness 

This is not the way to turn

Keep breathing 

Do something 

Anything 

It’s all a blur

Activity dulls

But doesn’t help focus 

Fog remains

Tears keep coming 

Hurt strikes at the worst of times

Mentally and emotionally drained 

Fog in mind 

Surrounds me with cold

I just keep praying 

God heal my pain

All I wanted was to be loved

The fog slices with emotional knives

It wears down my defenses 

Once again, I journey with Kismet 

Slowly this journey with Kismet 

Will either strengthen 

Or destroy 

Life and existence 

My struggle 

Each day

Either seek God or give in to despair 

I believe somehow, somehow 

Hope to go on will be seen

Get me out of this painful fog

 

The passage in Psalms I shared referred to God as my refuge and a place to pour out my heart.  I must be like Zero Sugar Minute Maid fruit punch being poured into my Green Lantern mug as the mug fills the bottle empties.  When we pour our hearts out into God who is our refuge, he defends us and shows himself strong.  See God has called me to encourage people and sometimes I let myself be vulnerable to do so.  I’m baring my heart with poetry.  Not all will relate but I’m being honest and open.  If God can somehow use someone as feeble and broken as me then he’s not done with you.  I want you to leave this blog knowing God wants our hearts, our troubles, our mess all of it.  

“Heal the wound but leave the scars 

A reminder of how merciful you are

I am broken, torn apart 

Take the pieces of this heart

And heal the wound but leave the scar”

 

If you’ve been hurt or are in emotional or mental battle, seek God.  Pick up his Word and pray.  Get the Youversion app and have it read devotionals and scripture to you.  Make God your first choice not your last.  Recently I went to a men’s Bible study group, and it was something I needed more than I would admit.  We need encouragement and like I said before if God can use my hurt to help someone else, I say go for it.  

 

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

 

“All praise to God, the father of our Lord Jesus Christ, God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.  He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others.  When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”

 

 

 

 

 

Honesty by Margaret Becker 

Big Enough by Chris Rice

All I need is you by Adie 

Tis so sweet by Amy Grant

What a friend by Kathryn Scott

Acoustic mix by Point of Grace 

 

 Safety 

The last two weeks have been quite the struggle.  I’m trying so hard to focus on anything.  The last thing I want to do is give in to anger and bitterness.  I don’t want to put up walls around me but at the same time I’m tired of being hurt.  Things have happened and my family and my new dog have helped a lot.  I keep relating to this part in the song Show the Way by Kim Hill.  

 

“Look, if someone wrote a play, Just to glorify what’s stronger than hate

Would they not arrange the stage

As if the hero came too late

He’s almost in defeat

It’s looking like the evil side will win”

  It’s the old plot to the Empire Strikes Back.  Everything that can go wrong has.  I truly feel like Evil has won.  I’m simply asking what’s next or as Goldberg would say “Who’s Next?”  This is the longest I’ve gone without doing a blog in a long time and it’s because I’m rattled.  Each day is just focus on something.  I don’t always quote secular music but this one song has been running through my head a lot.  You see I’ve spent years trying to share hope I really have.  I don’t know if I’ve even succeeded in what I’ve done.  I’ve always tried to help that one person who will listen.  

“Sometimes when your hopes have all been shattered 

There’s nowhere to turn

You wonder how you keep going 

Think of all the things that really matter

And the chances you’ve earned 

The fire in your heart is growing 

You can fly if you try leaving the past behind 

Heaven only knows what you may find

Dare 

dare to believe you can survive 

You hold the future in your hand

Dare

Dare to keep all your dreams alive

It’s time to take a stand

You can win if you dare”

There’s been 3 verses I keep coming back to because a week and a half ago I lost my job, I got a new one and a dog named Arisia.  I lost my confidence in my ability to even be a security guard.  I was that rattled.  It’s something I enjoy I like to think I might be good at it but the way things all went down I had no focus afterwards.  None.  

I’m not alone as I have felt.  For lot’s of reasons I have cried a lot and being a man it doesn’t bother me to admit that.  Psalm 3:3-5 has been somewhere I keep turning.  If you know the history of me doing this blog it’s where it all started.  But verse 5 has been hitting me the hardest.  See I have this new dog Arisia, a Terrier/ American Staffordshire mix that is all muscle with a big head and she sleeps by the bed and protects me. She’ll make you feel safe and loved.  A gift of safety from God.    

Psalm 3:3-5 

“But you, O Lord, are a shield around me, you are my glory, the one who holds my head high.  I cried out to the Lord, and he answered me from his holy mountain.  I lay down and slept, yet I woke up in safety, for the Lord was watching over me.”  

With everything by Hillsong 

Show the way by Kim Hill

All I need is you by Adie

Dare by Stan Bush

Hymn of Praise

 

Hymn of praise 

 

I will be the first to admit that the book of Jeremiah is one of the harder books in the Bible to get through.  It’s a lot of judgment on nations that people these days have never seen and it’s not easy to relate to but sometimes you find things among all the doom and gloom that get your attention.  In Jeremiah chapter 51 I was reading all about the destruction of Babylon when I came across this section called A Hymn of Praise to the Lord.  It at first seemed out of place but then it doesn’t.  Because sometimes we need to be put in a headlock have our heads shaken and remember who he is and who we are not.   It’s an RKO outta Nowhere to get our attention.  

 

Jeremiah 51:15-19

 

“The Lord made the earth by his power, and he preserves it by his wisdom.  With his own understanding he stretched out the heavens.  When he speaks in the Thunder, the heavens are filled with water.  He causes the clouds to rise over the earth.  He sends the lightning with the rain and releases the wind from his storehouses.  

 

The whole human race is foolish and has no knowledge!  The craftsmen are disgraced by the idols they make, for their carefully shaped works are a fraud.  These idols have no breath or power.  Idols are worthless; they are ridiculous lies!  On the day of reckoning they will all be destroyed.  But the God of Israel is no idol!  He is the Creator of everything that exists, including his people, his own special possession.  The Lord of Heavens’ armies is his name!”  

 

 

Give us clean hands by Charmaine

Revelation song by Newsboys 

Just one person

 

Just one person

 

Charlie Mike

Continue the mission

Be a hopegiver

Hope found in God’s Word

If just one person

Draws closer to God

The goal will be accomplished

I get

Discouraged

I fail and fall

God provides

Timely encouragement

Must

Continue the mission

God’s not done

With me

Or you

Must share

Hope

It’s a blog

And a Bible study

That’s weird

He’s weird

Week upon week

Doesn’t make sense

He keeps sharing

Passion

For just one person

To draw closer to God

Illustrations not normal

The mission continued

Be a hopegiver

Hope

Is

A

Person

Named

Jesus

Must keep sharing

For just one person

To draw closer to God

 

 

 

 

Directors cut:  I channeled a lot of the reasons I continue to do a weekly Bible study blog into a poem.  I included the discouragement the ups and downs.  I know a poem is not a normal thing to share but I was reminded of the power of pen, paper and thoughts this week.